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Expert Contribution

Helping to Grieve During the Holidays

Grieving during the holidays can be an especially challenging time for individuals who have experienced loss. Here are some ways to help those who are grieving during the holiday season:

  • Offer Your Presence: Sometimes, the most important thing you can do is simply be there for the person who is grieving. Let them know you are available to listen or spend time with them, even if they don’t feel like talking.
  • Acknowledge Their Feelings: It’s essential to acknowledge their grief and not try to push them to be festive or cheerful if they are not ready. Let them express their feelings without judgment.
  • Respect Their Choices: Everyone grieves differently. Some may want to participate in holiday traditions, while others may prefer to skip them altogether. Respect their choices and don’t pressure them to do anything they are not comfortable with.
  • Create New Traditions: Suggest creating new traditions or modifying existing ones to accommodate their feelings. This can help make the holiday season more manageable and meaningful.
  • Memorialize and Remember: Encourage them to honor their loved one’s memory by setting up a memorial or sharing stories. Lighting a candle or creating a scrapbook in their memory can be therapeutic.
  • Provide Practical Support: Grief can be physically and emotionally draining. Offer to help with practical tasks such as cooking, cleaning or shopping so they have more time to grieve.
  • Send a Thoughtful Card or Gift: A heartfelt card or small gift can show that you are thinking of them and care about their well-being.
  • Offer to Attend Support Groups: Suggest attending support groups or therapy together. Sometimes, talking to others who are experiencing similar grief can be comforting.
  • Avoid Making Assumptions: Don’t assume you know what they need. Ask them how you can support them and be flexible in your approach.
  • Be Patient: Grieving is a long process, and it doesn’t follow a set timeline. Be patient and understanding, and don’t expect them to “get over it” quickly.
  • Check-In Regularly: Continue to check in on them after the holidays. Grief doesn’t disappear after the season ends, and they may still need support in the weeks and months that follow.
  • Encourage Self-Care: Remind them to take care of themselves, both physically and emotionally. Encourage them to seek help when necessary.
  • Help with Children: If they have children, offer to help with childcare or activities to give them some space to grieve.
  • Share Positive Memories: Share positive memories of their loved one, focusing on the joy and love they brought into their life.

Remember that everyone’s grief is unique, and what works for one person may not work for another. The most important thing is to be compassionate, understanding and willing to adapt your support to their needs during this difficult time.


About The Author

Funeral Home
Robert D'Anjolell, Jr., F.D.
DANJOLELL Memorial Homes
610-356-4200

Since 1963, DANJOLELL Memorial Homes & Crematory has served the Philadelphia metro region by offering expert funeral services. Rob D’Anjolell’s family and partners have been voted Best Funeral Home and are members of the National Funeral Directors Association. As the Funeral Home Supervisor now leading the most trusted name in funeral service for over 50 years, Rob D’Anjolell is Marple Newtown’s expert in all matters of funeral services and known by all for having the capabilities to conduct funerals for all faiths while integrating tasteful life celebration.

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